07.17.2012 Arthur

This might be old news, but "Arthur" is now officially available to watch on Netflix. I'm not expecting that you drop what you're doing to watch a grade school filled with petting zoo animals as they navigate the waters of life's moral dilemmas. I'm just expecting that you appreciate a show that has molded a generation (whether or not our generation really turned out too well can be left out of the equation).

Allow me to simply leave you with one of the most iconic and inspirational television theme songs in the history of American television (yes, ALL American television). It also happens to be a great song to throw into any party playlist.. just not too early in the night. You need to earn it.

Because why can't every day be "a wonderful kind of day?"

07.09.2012 Twizzlers on Twitter

With that kind of alliteration, it's no surprise that Twizzlers impressed me today with their acts of Twitter heroism.

Imagine yourself cruising through your local Target store (cart vs. basket is probably irrelevant, but let's get crazy and say you're swinging a basket), and you want to pick up some licorice. Not feeling Red Vines, don't want the Pull-N-Peel, ignoring the chocolate (ignoring it so much that you don't even think about it.. so forget I said anything), and when you reach for a classic bag of Strawberry Twizzlers, you're outraged to only find the "Family Size." Do I look like I have a family? Are you feeding the self-fulfilling prophecy of American obesity? No (and maybe).

My reaction was obviously to Tweet my outrage for all my Twitter followers to scroll past for more exciting updates from Justin Bieber or CNN. However, to my shock, I received an instant response from Twizzlers, directing me to a Hershey's product finder. Who knew that even though nobody really cares about those chocolate Twizzlers, they can easily be found at the touch of a button!

07.05.2012 Berlin Fashion Week

Berlin has a fashion week. You know, in case you weren't aware. That's all I wanted to really say.

After all, a picture speaks a thousand words, and this one probably speaks about a tausend (that's German for "thousand" in case the humor wasn't entirely evident). 

Source: DPA

07.04.2012 Independence Day

No Fourth of July celebration is ever complete without a viewing of the 1996 Will Smith classic "Independence Day." However, American television networks decided that wasn't important this year. Instead we were forced to tolerate a full-day marathon of "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" on E!.

I'm sorry, but I thought we were going to celebrate how awesome America is, not spend the day shaking our heads and rolling our eyes at a family whose only somewhat meaningful contribution to the United States was Bruce Jenner's gold medal in the 1976 Olympic decathlon. I digress.

Because I didn't get to watch one of the greatest Jeff Goldblum films of all time (he has a lower bar than Will Smith- "Hitch" is a pretty awesome movie), I want only to get on my soap box to remind people how awesome that movie is. Let's just say I hope America gets their priorities in order by 2013.

07.03.2012 Hillstone Restaurant

The Hillstone on 27th and Park in New York City provided the chic (though dimly lit) backdrop for a ladies' night/Independence Day's Eve dinner, where my request for suggestions resulted in recommendations that covered no less than 50% of the menu. This doesn't include the $2 bread. The $2 bread is apparently not worth it. I've been warned. You've been warned. We've all been warned to avoid value-priced carbs.

Before continuing, I'd like to note that this is my first foray into the world of restaurant reviews. For those that know me well, you may agree that I am possibly the least qualified to provide any opinion on food. Based on the fact that the staples of my diet consist of  instant iced coffee packs, mac'n'cheese, peanut butter, and multivitamins in gummy bear form (they're good enough that I don't mind eating more than the recommended daily dose), you're probably right.

This is why I'll only be covering the condiments. Actually, I don't think I'm qualified to do even that, so I'm just going to include a picture and say I'm really glad that even though my friends ordered an amount of condiments unheard for a group of four girls (three girls actually, since one of the members of our party has a deep-seated and somewhat rational fear of condiments), the restaurant staff at Hillstone was more than accommodating and definitely did not outwardly appear to be judging us. Long sentence short, I'm a fan.

07.02.2012 'The Star Wars That I Used To Know'

Accurate. Entirely accurate. So accurate that I won't even pretend that I don't know how accurate it is because I'm afraid people will judge me for liking Star Wars. Judge me. I like Star Wars, and I like this video. End of story.

On a side note, definitely not going to pretend that this guy's not attractive... maybe without the Jedi braid.

07.01.2012 Missed Connections

After a brief hiatus, during which all THREE of this blog's followers (thanks for making me feel semi-relevant, you three) were feeling a void in their lives, I'm back. I felt terrible to leave for any amount of time, not knowing where people would go to hear very particular and unnecessarily sarcastic commentary on random topics (disproportionately favoring Wisconsin-related subjects). That made me feel as though there was a void in MY life. If you will, let's call it a "missed connection."

While I was missing the opportunity to connect with the world through my blog posts, most of which I suspect go unread, the people of the world continued to miss connections with complete strangers... leading them to Craigslist and the "Missed Connections" listings (now you see where I was going with all the background and build-up).

As I make my return, I leave you with this recent listing from Missed Connections NYC and only one question, "If a person with a foster cat named Yoda can't find love, who can?" Actually, let's follow up with a second question: "Do cat-related pick-up lines actually work?" Ask yourself. And I'll see you again tomorrow.