Words cannot accurately describe my contempt for the mock turtleneck. There is a time and place for most fashion pieces, but our society has somehow been convinced that the turtleneck never has been, and never will be, out of style. Is your neck cold? Get a scarf. Do you like to cover yourself up as much as possible? Move to Antarctica. Are you asserting your belief in existentialism? Don't get me started.
Why write about something I dislike, you ask? Because while I dislike the shirt itself, I find great joy in seeing other people sport a great turtleneck. Honestly, if you want to wear it, go ahead. I won't stop you. I will have a difficult time controlling a look of distaste, but then I will remind myself that at least you aren't wearing acid washed jeans (you aren't still wearing acid washed jeans, are you?).
Source: L.L. Bean
(because what other source would I use to show off a turtleneck?)
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